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2005-01-28 8:07 p.m.

dream on me OR flabbergasted

A Tprophecy from about a week ago: "Of course she'll go back to him. Going back to an abusive ex-boyfriend and living out the rest of her days in misery, only to die penniless and alone would be quintessentially Japanese."

Well, he nailed it. He deserves a prize. A certificate, at least.

When I found out (messaging her on the cell phone- she was in the Narita Airport), my first reaction was... no reaction.

I thought for a minute, and then I said quietly, "Son of a bitch."

I thought for another minute, and then I shouted, "SON OF A BITCH!"

From there I of course had to listen to "You're Gonna Miss Me" by the Thirteenth Floor Elevators.

As advertised, I am indeed flabbergasted. How could she possibly go back to such a man?

She says he's really changed.

I say an asshole doesn't change his stripes.

She says that, while she doesn't feel passion yet, she thinks he deserves another chance.

Looking at those odds, I say don't bet the farm on it.

I'm angry, and I'm even... hurt.

And I have this sinking feeling like... Like I somehow lost to this guy. To Pralines and Dick, incarnate. How could she fall for such wheedling, petulant, manipulative, pathetic whining? How could she choose THAT over THIS?

i have never been so insulted in all my life
i could swallow the seas to wash down all this pride
first you run like a fool just to be at my side
and now you run like a fool but you just run to hide
and i can't abide

Maybe it's my pride that hurts more than my heart.

But he threatened to kill me! HE IS A BAD MAN!

But these words are for blind eyes.

Maybe it's best this way. For me, anyway. Not for her. There's no way I can imagine this being the best choice for her.

I could have loved her. possibly maybe...

Oh well.

In other news, I swear one of the preschool girls was trying to hump my leg the other day.

you're gonna miss me babe,