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2005-02-01 8:43 a.m.

five years, if you live that long OR five years: that's all we got

It's snowing outside. Snowing like hell frozen over, in fact.

Ugh. Kami, man. She nailed me. She got me good. Wow. I wasn't expecting this at all.

I wrote her a big long letter last night, half in English and half in Japanese. It'd probably be best if I didn't actually send it to her; I should just let it be. Hopefully the catharsis of just writing it will be sufficient.

I need to be the bigger man here.

I'm just so bored with cowards that say they want, and then they can't endure. She can't handle love, baby. It's obvious. (Is that copyright infringement?) Say it, Bjork!

you think you deny me of something
well i've got plenty
you're the one who's missing out
but you won't notice
till after five years

Anyway, the actual point of this entry is to celebrate the fifth anniversary of this diary (I had never heard the term blog when I started it, and I'm not very fond of the term). February 1st 2000 - February 1st 2005. That's 20% of my life. It's been a trip.

As always on this day, your assignment is to read old entries and weep at the sheer bittersweet beauty that is ME. I don't usually demand lacrimation on cue from friends, acquaintances, and the occasional stranger, but trust me, you'll feel better afterwards.

C'mon, it's just for today.

Nah. Nah. Do it. DO it.

No, seriously. Just do it. DO IT.

my brain hurt like a warehouse
it had no room to spare
i had to cram so many things to store
everything in there

and all the fat-skinny people
and all the tall-short people
and all the nobody people
and all the somebody people

i never thought i'd need so many people

my brain hurts a lot,