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2004-04-25 8:45 p.m.

i like being a cog in the machine

Generally I tend to like my job a little less each week. It's a good experience though, and difficulty is no reason to back down; if anything, it means you should be even more diligent. The job sucks, though, is the thing.

But. Last Monday I enjoyed it- I really enjoyed it- for the first time. I was teaching guitar and orchestra. I played guitar for the guitar class. They were very appreciative and very impressed with my playing (though of course they were 6th graders and easily impressed where such things are concerned). One of them asked me if I do private lessons afterwards.

And I conducted the orchestra, too, which I really enjoyed. (I took a conducting class in college (in which I got the worst grade of my college career, but still) and you tend to pick up a fair amount when you've spent as much time in dorchestras as I have.)

Usually I dislike being part of a group dynamic, stepping into rank and working as a cog in the machine (sorry to mix metaphors there). Making music is the notable exception. That I really enjoy, and making music with others is somehow more thrilling and pleasing than doing it alone. Teaching others to do this is something I think I could enjoy. I could really enjoy being a music teacher or a band director, I think.

But I could enjoy other things, as well, and I'm pretty far down another path at this point.

Did I tell you I'm going to Coachella? Unfortunately the first day was already sold out by the time we got around to buying our tickets. I really wanted to see Radiohead...

Conversation snippets overheard on the job:

"So, you're from El Salvador, but you think of yourself as Mexican, right? I mean, you're not El Salvadorian. You're Mexican!"

"Being drunk is my favorite thing in the whole world!"

let me set the battlements on fire,