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2003-04-26 11:38 a.m.


I've left. I've gone. The place I spent the last 5 or 6 years in, the place where I was a goat in sheep's clothing struggling to look just woolly enough to not be noticed is now in the past.

There will be things and certainly people that I will miss and feel nostalgic about. But I'm never going back there.

Not to live, anyway.

I may end up going back to see Junko. Because it seems we're still together. Maybe that will change when I go to France...

My sister said something interesting yesterday. "Unless you break up with her soon, I think you'll end up getting married to Junko. Because you practically are already."


Speaking of my sister, I don't know if I've ever mentioned her in here. Which is kind of surprising since she is cool. Maybe cooler than me. I know you doubt it could be possible, but... I consider myself largely responsible for her coolness. She's five years younger than me (just finished her freshman year of college), and I feel that I've been a major force in guiding her to be a cool chick. I'm proud of that.

She has excellent taste in music, movies, and art. She's a tough kickass chick who don't take no crap from nobody. She's a video game whiz- unusual for the fairer sex. And, certainly without any guidance from me, she has amazing social skills and is extremely good looking. Or so they say.

Anyway, that's my sister.

On the topic of France. Still no solid plans. I have made baby steps, though. I've come up with a list of companies I'd like to apply to, I've translated my resume and had it proofread by a Frenchie, and I almost applied for a job. Though I have yet to have made an actual application. I'll get to work on that right away.

I'm glad to be out of that place. I'm grateful for what I learned there, but... I feel like a butterfly just emerged from the chrysalis. It's time to fly away and leave broken containers behind.

I'm off to Los Angeles tomorrow, and the day after that I'll be hitting the doors. Wish me luck. My first goal is to get enough money to buy a laptop and pay for roundtrip airfare to England.

Did I tell you I'm going to England in August? For a weeklong karate training course. There's a chance they might give me a black belt then, which would KICK ASS.

And I won't have a computer until I get around to buying that laptop, so... updates may be sparse until then.

Not that they've been frequent lately...

what a beautiful dream
that could flash on a screen
in a blink of an eye and be gone from me

i'll be a dolphin,