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2001-09-16 4:39 p.m.

excuses, junko, tuesday, junko, duchess, junko, weezer, and did i mention junko?

It's been a while, I know. I've either not had internet access or I've been extremely busy (this semester will be the most time consuming I've ever had, though I think I'll still be able to get good grades, as long as I put in the necessary time).

I don't really know what to say about what happened Tuesday. It's strange. I've never seen the American people so unified in my whole life as I've seen after all of that went down... how's it going to end? I don't much want to talk about that right now though, even though I'm thinking about it constantly (as I'm sure most Americans are)...

Things with Junko are still going well. Looks like this could last a while. My attitude has changed from "there's no way I would ever marry her" to "I probably wouldn't marry her." This attitude change may not make any difference in the long run, but it seems scary just now... At this point I really want to graduate from college "unattached." But I appreciate her so much... She's wonderful. Kelly asked me what the basis of our relationship is. Tell me if I already put this in here (I don't think I did). The basis of our relationship is mutual adoration. She absolutely adores me. And I adore her.

One of my favorite things about Junko is that she doesn't say stupid shit. While she's not someone I would characterize as extremely intelligent, the stuff that comes out of her mouth is pretty smart by my standards- a lot smarter than a lot of the bullshit supposedly smart people are often spewing. I guess what I mean when I talk about "saying stupid shit" is when people talk about things they know nothing about as if they were experts, when every word they say is a plea for attention, when their whole goal in communicating with others is self-aggrandizement, and when all of this is really just to cover their low self-esteem. Stuff like that.

I'm going to see Weezer tomorrow. Yay!

About Duchess... We ended up having a big fight, spread out over several days. I think things are mostly okay now, but there's a weirdness between us now that wasn't there before... I think we're farther from getting back together now than we've ever been. It was odd- I finally saw her from the point of view of people who dislike her. I could never understand why some people dislike her so much. Now I do. Weird how that can happen after a relationship ends, isn't it?

I can't stop thinking about Junko. When I'm not with her, I wish I was. She comforts me. Apparently I'm the most serious boyfriend she's ever had. I find that really hard to believe- she's beautiful, fun to be with, attentive, thoughtful, and a very good kisser. I just try not to think about how it will all end up...

Are you tired of hearing about my girlfriend yet? I could always talk about DNA subcloning, protein manipulation, or chemical thermodynamics.

i sink down to the bottom of the sea,

greyarea

Diaryland